You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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