Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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