You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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