well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
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