I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You ruined the universe
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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