I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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