Are we in a gay sports bar?
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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