She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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