Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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