Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Randomize