I just cut my nipple shaving
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize