there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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