now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Congratulations! We have a period
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize