ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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