He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
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He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
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he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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