Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize