I think scott just propositioned me for sex
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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