i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
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Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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