last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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