I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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