What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize