This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
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She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
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aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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