Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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