on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize