Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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