just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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