Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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