office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Houston, we have a blender
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His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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