we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize