Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize