I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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