You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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