I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
home. puking in laundry basket.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
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Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
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I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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