I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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