a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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