It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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