Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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