Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize