if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
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