That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize