My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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