On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize