I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Randomize