"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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