Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize