i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
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you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
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Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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