My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
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He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
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Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
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