yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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