It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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