Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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